Issue 01 - Relaunch - Object Time Machine

Hello, subscribers to "Hi Love," this very newsletter, started many years by me, Charlie Grosso, sent erratically for years, and now rebooted as an experiment. Thank you for being here. I love having you.

If you are new here or learning about me for the first time, I am a writer, photographer, and founder of an educational nonprofit working with refugee teens.

Once upon a time, I photographed fashion models for fancy labels, creatively directed this and that before hitting the road for years of nomadic living. Somewhere in between, I ran a contemporary art gallery in NYC and created a photo documentary project about food markets across the world, spanning 42 countries and 120 cities.

If you are curious about the name of this newsletter, you can read the origin story in the previous post. I'll write more about the thinking behind this format in the next issue. Now, on with the letter…

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Hi Love,

His name was Danny. We meet at a mutual friend's house. I was a junior at USC and he was a senior. All of us gathered at Paul's house that night were Theater majors. It was a damp and raining night, unusual for Los Angeles. The moment I walked into the apartment and saw Danny, I had the strongest feeling --- I knew I knew him. He had the same feeling about me. We couldn't put our finger on it but we both could swear that we've met before.

A meandering courtship followed.

I was trying to figure out how to extricate myself from my first boyfriend James. That relationship was abusive in many ways, but I need to be loved to survive my home life and James loved me. So I endured a lot more than what was reasonable, more than anyone should. When Danny entered my life, James and I were in that awkward on and off phase of the break-up. He had moved out but still had access to my apartment, the tethers were being cut, painfully, one by one.

One night Danny and I stayed up late talking on the phone and I had a craving for cake. Nothing fancy, just the good o' Entenmann or Sara Lee kind. I was a college student with a matching budget and tastes. I wanted cake SO badly. Despite how much I craved cake, my resistance to going out and getting it was stronger. So it goes. There was no cake and Danny and I eventually said goodnight.

The next morning there was a cassette tape stuck to my front door.

Danny wrote a poem called "Let Them Eat Cake." He scribbled the poem down on a piece of notebook paper and recorded himself reading the poem. He drove across town in the middle of the night and left it for me to find.

I loved the gesture and the poem.

I tucked the poem inside the cassette and hide it somewhere. I didn't want James to find it. I didn't want the fight.

I never saw that tape again. I hid it so well, I hid it from myself.

When Danny graduated, he took off with the posture of a man looking to disappear and outrun himself. Many of us didn't know his new phone number or how to get a hold of him.

Twenty-plus years later, I still think about Danny and that tape he made me. Not because there is anything to rekindle but because he was a kindred and how many of those do we meet in a lifetime? As we speed along into this digital reality of instantly everything all the time, there is something so beautiful about an object that anchors us in a particular time and space. And maybe even more so now that I have nothing that would allow me to play this tape even if I still had it.

A few years later, I woke up in the middle of the night with the outline of a children's book perfectly plotted. A story of losing things that held so much meaning for us through each phase of our lives.

Will you tell me about something that you lost and what the object symbolized for you?

I'm shifting a lot of different things in my mind space, freeing myself up to follow ideas and experiments that I've thought about for eons, such as this story and Hi Love. I'd love to know about some of the precious objects you've lost and maybe work that into the book if you don't mind being my inspiration and muse.

With Love,

Charlie

Issue 00 - Why Hi Love,

Hi Love, is my favorite greeting. Vu was the first person to greet me with "Hi Love!" It took me by surprise when I first heard it. He and I are friends and colleagues. Without a whiff of romance and being addressed as "love" was...unexpected. And incredibly flattering. Through those two little words, I was transformed into a personification of love, platonic love, romantic love, simply, LOVE.

An immediate sense of intimacy is established through these two words, I feel seen, safe, and cared for. A little dose of optimism (and we could all use a little bit more of that.)

I'm sorry I've been absent. I'm ready to return, in this form, a bi-monthly note every Sunday. And if you are new here, welcome! It’s great having you here. If you are clicking around, what is here in the “archive” is the alpha version of Hi Love. It sometimes takes a bit to get where we want to go again.

Subscribe and give "Hi Love"a few weeks first before you decide if it should stay or go?!

With LOVE! Thank you.

Who are you? Is EVERYTHING about identity politics

Hi Love,

Who are you?

Who do you belong to?

These questions were posed to me and a group of type A high-achievers. Abstract, philosophical and potentially squishy questions.

Person, places and the issue of identity is picking up momentum and taking up space in our collective consciousness. Within the last ten days, I've had four separate conversations about identity and identity politics.

The interesting thing is that I am both for and against identity. How can something be both true and not true?!

When discussing inequality I believer race and gender are important intersectional factors that are critical to the discourse. A discussion on inequality (in every level) without factoring in the person or the group's race and gender leads us to a Calvinist Republican attitude towards poverty alleviation, i.e., hardwork alone, pull yourself up by your bootstraps kind of policies (it hasn't worked).

At the same time, not every action someone makes is an insult perpetrated based on identity, it can be, but not always. For examples, members of a women group I am part of often interprets everything through a gendered lens. Every slight inflicted is simply because they are a woman; every additional responsibility assigned is because women are often asked to do more (often unpaid).

I wish there is a defined line. Categorical choices for when you are in discussion of XYZ, all aspects of identity is critical and should be considered; and when conversations are about ABC, maybe we should step back from filter everything through the lens of race, gender, class, and etc., and consider it on human grounds first and foremost. The line is faint and the playbook is blank.

What do we do?

Some of the more intriguing ideas that floated across my view this week on the issues of identity include:

1. 9/11 was a defining point in elevating identity and identity politics. (Interesting. I hadn't considered trying to pinpoint a turning point for when we started looking at ourselves and each other through this inflection point.)

2. Identity is so fraught, so impossible to talk about in the current climate, fiction becomes the only safe space for exploration. (I have lots of thoughts on the role of fiction which I'll follow up in another note later).

3. Identity politics is entirely an invention of the US. (I completely disagree with.)

Daughter, American, Woman, Photographer, Nomad, USC Alumni, Expat, Writer, Chinese, Agnostic, Goth, Rebel, Wife, New Yorker, Globe Trotter, EHF Fellow, Creative Director, Taiwanese, Adventurer, Executive Director are only some of the identities that I've worn, discarded and claimed. Yet none of them are my first instinct when someone asks me how I consider myself.

I am me. And I belong to myself.

That is my first answer and the one that feels the most truthful. Every other label, albeit many of them are outside of our control, are like a costume, something we can slip on and off, ever-changing and shifting, depending on the audience.

Who are you, my love? And who do you belong to?

Your Ever Shapeshifting

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

Instagram fanatics! Buffer introduced a new feature this week where the app will fill out the first comment on a new post for you. What do you mean? Instagram allows for up to 30 hashtags per post, but you don't want all those tags to be in the description of the post ~ it looks sloppy. So, this means you can post the majority of them, say 27 of those relevant hashtags in the first comment section. Now, Buffer will do that for you. 

WORTH A READ

Against Identity Politics. The New Tribalism and the Crisis of Democracy
By Francis Fukuyama (Foreign Affairs)
Don't let the title fool you. Fukuyama lays out the wins and fails of identity politics, areas and examples where it was great for propelling the agenda forward: #METOO, Black Lives Matter, and also the shortcomings: the rise popularism worldwide. He also offers some concrete suggestions on what is missing and ways to reframe the conversation going forward.  
 

WANDERLUST

(upcoming) Norway, Thailand, Kurdistan, and Boston. DC has been postponed. 

DON'T MISS

Billions (Showtime). It's not a super addictive show, you can pace it out and sometimes that is a great thing. The writing and acting are super solid. It's a great cipher to understand what motivates people. 

We are Both Puppet and Puppeteer

Hi Love,

We watched Lauren Greenfield's documentary, "Generation Wealth" last night. Greenfield and I both lived and worked in LA around the same time. I never found resonance with her work but I was curious as this particular film is a synthesis of a 25-year career, an opportunity to have some reflection. 
 
I found the film depressing. 

"Generation Wealth" as the title suggests is a documentary about a generation of that grew up on material excess fueled by reality TV. Lives spent chasing money, fame, attention and a sense of personal worth based on the envy of others. 

Forty plus years of vapid excess nothingness lead us to this moment in history, the Trump Presidency as the proverbial cherry on top.

Meanwhile, a counter-culture has been brewing and it's accelerating. Marie Kondo and minimal lifestyle; tiny houses and van life; mediation, wellness, and DMT. Marianne Williamson's bid for president is one of many indications that the counter culture is making a move for the crown to become the dominant culture. And if that's not evidence enough, the wellness industry saw a 12.8% growth from 2015-2017 bringing the market size to $4.2 trillion and growing. Calm, the meditation app has been valued at $250 million dollars. 

The materialists are not giving up. They continue to extract value from our personal data with little benefit to us, they commodify and weaponized our attention in a desperate battle to remain relevant and dominant. 

It's hard to say who will win this fight. These massive culture shifts are gradual and it takes time (but we are desperate for change now!) and it's worth remembering that the "loser" does not face extinction just less oxygen and capital. Abandoning the remnants of the Gold Standard in 1971 triggered the excess of the '80s, which brought us Trump and his ilk. The crowning of this idiot king has been more than 40 years in the making. The 2008 economic crisis shattered our sense of invincibility and that trauma shaped the worldview for a generation that has finally come of age. Instead of material wealth, we search the globe for one of a kind experiences and attempt to program our days for mindfulness. But these are just the beginning. The pendulum swings every 30-40 years and we are both the puppet and puppeteer. 

Humans are not great at these long term trend forecasting. We are good at looking back and see the path that brought us here but seldom are we able to see the whole chess board, be 10-20 steps ahead, and consciously play the game for collective gain. 

For starter, humans don't experience time in longitudinally but momentarily. Everything is personal. This is happening to me, now, and we act in reaction to, rarely in response to. We've long given up the ten-year plan because it feels futile. The world is chaotic and technology drives change at a rate we can no longer comprehend. In addition, we are biased towards narratives that are linear, one input for one output, if this then that. Actions have consequences; hard work and will power will always prevail. We select for facts and information that fits our narrative bias and conveniently ignores everything that tells us otherwise. We are not great at holding multiple thoughts in our head at the same time and forget it if these thoughts are in contradiction of one another. We are emotional creatures assuming the fixed framework of robotic logic. 

Of course, we didn't see it coming, we weren't designed to. 

Irrespective, we are in the middle of it, a seismic shift that will dictate the world order (and maybe even the remaining days of our planet given the dire predictions of climate change) for the next half-century. What will it be? We are both puppet and puppeteer; hopeless and in-control. There is only one thing to do, use the time, nudge the pendulum and build up muscle memories for a future and a culture that we want. 

With love, 

Charlie 

PS. I am not endorsing Marianne Williamson for 2020 but her stump speech is worth watching. 

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

A chance for some good karma. 

There are plenty of resources for starting your start-up but little on how to shut it down. Fill out this survey and share your shut-down experience, wisdom, and insights for those who are in need.

WORTH A READ

 Two books caught my attention this week (no, I've not had a chance to read them yet): 

How to Disappear: Notes on Invisibility in a Time of Transparency by 
Akiko Busch. The jacket blurb: It is time to reevaluate the merits of the inconspicuous life, to search out some antidote to continuous exposure, and to reconsider the value of going unseen, undetected, or overlooked in this new world. Might invisibility be regarded not simply as refuge, but as a condition with its own meaning and power? The impulse to escape notice is not about complacent isolation or senseless conformity, but about maintaining identity, autonomy, and voice.

William Stoner and the Battle for the Inner Life by Steve Almond. Almond is a friend and also one of my favorite authors. I could have sworn I read him saying something to the extent of, in trying to get the world to pay attention to us, we forgot to pay attention to our lives. But, I can't seem to find this "quote" anywhere. Regardless, pre-order, read, and I promise you won't regret it, Almond is that good. 

WANDERLUST

(upcoming) Norway, Thailand, and Kurdistan, with DC and Boston, peppered in-between. I know this sounds like heresy but this particular type of travel is a lot less fun and a whole lot of tiring. 

DON'T MISS

The opening monologue from The Newsroom, even if you are not an Aaron Sorkin fanatic. It's the vision of America that we all need and simply fantastic. 

Who is Denting the Universe?

Hi Love,

In reply to last week's note, one of you wisely said, "the world is very judgmental. [And For most of us] it is a delicate balance in sharing our depth and safeguarding our vulnerability." 

Later that night, after issue 14 went out, I saw Amanda Palmer on tour for her new album, "There will be No Intermission." My love for Amanda resides in my head rather than in my gut, such as my love for Pearl Jam, but the difference between one versus the other is another note for another day.

"There will be no Intermission" is a Bruce Springsteen style show where the talent does a lot of storytelling throughout and play a little music along the way; the songs are the fruit of the stories that precede it. The narrative is personal, Springsteen talked about his alcoholic father and depressed mother, Amanda Palmer spent four hours talking about death and abortion. It was intense. It was depressing. It was deeply personal. 

It is not unusual for artists to mine their personal lives for raw materials for their art. Both male and female artists have done it, Bukowski and Plath are just two of such artists staring back at me from the bookshelves. What is striking about Amanda's latest work is how naked and vulnerable she allows herself to be, even more so that the deepest confessional poets. The artifice was that there is no artifice. Just Amanda. 

What Amanda did on stage was the antithesis of Witches in the C-Suite. Some say that she is preaching to the choir, her fans, and does little to move the needle beyond her reach, i.e., Texas state legislature, but I disagree. She put something out in the Universe and it will have a ripple effect. The frustration is the inability to accurately measure the impact. 

A few nights later, I saw Melinda Gates in conversation with Brene Brown. Melinda Gates is currently on tour promoting her new book, "The Moment of Lift." 

"The Moment of Lift" talks about a variety of challenges women all over the world face: unpaid work, access to capital, education, healthcare and etc. Big gnarly topics, each impacting women's lives intimately. 

During the conversation with Brene, Melinda opened up (a little) about reconciling her Catholicism and Gate's global initiative to increase access to birth control (Depo-Provera not condoms) but the conversation is as you would expect from someone of Melinda's stature, composed, measured. Suitable for the C-Suite. Thesis to Amanda's antithesis. 

Melinda's work in gender equality through both the Gates Foundation and her personal channels are guided by quantitative data, a 30,000 view from high, and the impact of the work is carefully measured. Amanda's work is driven by qualitative data and often limited to her own experience. Yet a fundamental core of their work shares an acknowledgment, "I see you, I hear you." You need someone to express all the pain and fear and loneliness that is part of life. You need someone to hear your need and struggle." 

They each come at the work from a different vantage point, and vastly different style and flare. There is no right way. Feminists and Patriarchy both want us to believe that there is an only way, a more effective way, a more impactful method.  Yet that is not life. A single input, a tweak in the variables, and there is an observable change in outcome. We will never know with certainty which approach will move the needle more, or if the existence of the antithesis is essential for the thesis to succeed. 

With Love, 

Charlie 

PS. Promise next week it will not be about women, gender and etc....

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

I'm short on amazing tricks and hacks this week. The best advice we gave to clients all week is:you need to consult a lawyer on this.

I know, if you are anything like me, the idea of a lawyer is scary!!! It's grown up stuff. Am I in trouble? It sounds really expensive. Here is the thing, there are many situations in life where you will be better off to engage the advice of counsel then to muddle it out on your own. Our client might very well be in a pickle because their first call was not to a lawyer. 

On the note of lawyers, Facebook's new general counsel is Jennifer Newstead, a key player in the creation of the Patriot Act and making it palatable for the American public. Which means....might be time to seriously consider divorcing FB and Instagram. 

WORTH A READ

(How) Patriarchy is Spoiling America’s Next Election One of America’s Next Great Tests is Whether it Can Transcend Patriarchy — and It’s Already Flunking - by Umair Haque
There are so many insightful (and no duh moments in this essay, it's astounding when its all laid out with such clarity." One of them is "the deep, hidden double standard that men can prove their character by what they’ve done, but women can only prove their character by what they haven’t." On point with thesis and antithesis,

WANDERLUST

Norway is ON! Thailand just got added to the list as well. I've been honored with the Kravis Leadership Moonshot House Fellowship which will take place this year in Thailand in June. The immediately after I will leave for Kurdistan Iraq for round two of Hello Future. The summer schedule is getting packed and I must admit, I'm tired and it's not yet May. 

DON'T MISS

Our Plant on Netflix narrated by David Attenborough. 
First of all, it's amazing! Incredible footage as you've come to expect from Blue Planet and Planet Earth (BBC). It's even better (in my opinion) because Attenborough uses this opportunity to highlight the perils of climate change. A missing narrative and missed opportunity in those previous series. 

Witches in the C-Suite

Hi Love,

Someone recently asked if anyone had a recommendation for a tarot card reader on a private all women group I belong to. She is hosting a party and would like to hire a reader for entertainment. 

Members come forth with recommendations aplenty. The popularity of this thread prompted conversation and astonishment, "look at all of us, witches and pagans in hiding." 

It's important to note that this list is exclusive. The women here are C-level executives, big-time investors, famous media personalities, award-winning journalists. In a word, led-git.

Despite all of the professional credos, we still hold back these deepest part of ourselves, parts that are perceived to be fringe, woo-woo, unscientific, therefore women's business.

Why is that? 

Is this just the double standard women feel like we must live with? We've worked so hard to be taken seriously, we do not want to risk it by admitting to our obsession with the esoteric. 

Yet, there is no shortage of male investors and entrepreneurs bragging about their latest Ayahuasca ceremony or attending Burning Man with gusto. 

Meanwhile, I've been asked to help review some incoming applications for the Edmund Hillary Fellowship (FULL DISCLOSURE, I am a fellow). In the review guidelines, we are asked to not only consider the idea for the venture but also who they are as a person. 

Out of the eight applications I reviewed, only three people filled out the personal section of applications, the rest left it blank, and only one provided sufficient and compelling materials on who they are. Only ONE application out of Eight had enough confidence/trust/vulnerability to share who they are with the reviewers.  The rest of the applications I had to evaluate the ventures alone. 

We hear this said all the time by VC's, that they are investing in the person and not the idea. 

Yet, there are still many who are reluctant to put who we are out there, front and center. Even in this oversaturated world of personality brands and influencers, even when it is culturally acceptable, encouraged by investors. 

Why do you think that is? 

Happy Easter! 

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

We talk about the importance of diversity in companies, C-suits, and corporate boards, really, everywhere. Recent research fromColumbia Business Schoolshows that living abroad and dating someone from another countryimproves our own creativityand creativity tests in the real world. All the more reason to get out of your comfort zone and date someone with a different cultural perspective. 

WORTH A READ

Keeping in themes with this week's note...

Venture Capitals are Investing in Astrology, via The New York Times 
Amazon Prime is using Astrology to Sell You Stuff, via Fast Company
The New Age of Astrology, via The Atlantic

And if you want something fun to read and still on-topic, I recommend A Discovery of Witches Trilogy. 

I'm flirting with a full stack of books right now, some new, some old. I haven't landed in one just yet...when I do, we will return to long-form reads. 



WANDERLUST

Thanks to all of your nudges, I will be heading to Oslo for the Oslo Freedom Forum and spending a few extra days there as well. So keep your Norway recommendations coming. I know it's an expensive country...What was the highlight to your Norway Adventures?

DON'T MISS

Stranger Magic, A Podcast about all things Tarot. 
And of course, if you are not in the mood for 600 pages, try the TV adaptation of A Discovery of Witches. Matthew Goode is still ever so handsome and enjoyable to watch. 

Don't Marry Him For His Record Collection

Hi Love,

This weekend J and I are celebrating our two year anniversary. We have many anniversaries; we like celebrating the absolute joy of being together. This weekend marks our very first coffee, not a date, a work-related coffee where I got to ask him lots of questions about non-profits and foundation funding. 

J's presence, his life story, the work he has dedicated his life to influences me and my thinking on multiple fronts. He grew up in the projects in the South Bronx and a person of color. By luck and happenstance, his father was told to get young J tested and see if his test scores are good enough to attend one of the elite public schools in the city. Getting accepted into Hunter College Campus Schools changed his life, this education helped him reach far in his life and career. 

I grew up in a low-middle income family that eventually worked itself to be high-middle income. Life was never extravagant as the fear of near poverty never left my parents and grandparents. Yet inequality, privilege and greater racial dynamic are academic concepts to me rather than a personal one. 

I don't think of myself as a Chinese American woman with an excellent education, upper-middle-class income and achieved a fascinating career path. I didn't realize it was unusual to not consider myself in the standard classifications. This is not to say that I don't understand how the external world sees me, I just don't use these identifiers instinctively.  

Issues of privilege and inequality are top of mind for J. It is part of his work, his worldview. And his view has seeped into mine, broadening and deepening my scope. This is a gift I couldn't have anticipated. It sounds silly to say because every significant other have left their mark, some deeper than others, some in attitude towards life while others only their obsession with Peter Gabrielle. 

There are so many things I wish we were briefed on as young adults, about love, life, money, career, partnership. So many miss opportunities where we could have made better choices, saner choices. It took me thirty-eight years to get love and partnership right and I am ever so grateful I finally figured it out. 

With Love, 

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

In a recent client memo, I outlined a 101 on sponsorships/partnerships/collaborators. 
Sponsorship: A brand/company, usually for-profit. 

Partnerships: Tangentially mission/project aligned institutions, non-profits, and for-profits. 
Notable Personality/Influencers: People with a significant following (social and otherwise) and influence over their audience.

Then under each category, we break down what the ask is (monetary/in-kind donation, cross-promotion), the upside for them (their motivation for supporting the client/cause), and the upside for the client. 

It's a helpful cheat sheet to think about who to approach and what a reasonable ask could be. 

WORTH A READ

Austin Kleon's Keep Going is out. Full disclosure, I've not read the book (yet) but I'm a big fan of his previous title, Steal Like an Artist. It's great and I think even more insightful for those who are not artists or have such inclinations. 

WANDERLUST

Oslo, Norway. I've been invited to a conference and all-conference is a mixed bag of "meeting you changed my life" and "I should have stayed home." Has anyone been to Oslo? Tell me what it's like and help me tally the pro/con.

DON'T MISS

I binged watched Orphan Black, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and Killing Eve this past month. It was A LOT of TV but there were a lot of long flights and even longer layovers. 

Each of them features fascinating female characters. I particularly liked Orphan Black and Killing Eve. 

I blame Mercury Retrograde

Hi Love,

I'msorryI'msorryI'msorry! 

I have not abandoned you. I just got overwhelmed with work and travel, but the real culprit is Mercury in retrograde. 

Okay, to be fair, it's more like it all started with Mercury in retrograde. Mercury stopped in Picese (water sign) and I was forewarned to watch out for electronics and water. My water bottle leaked due to improper handling (me) and an indispensable 1yr old MacBook Pro gradually soaked up the liquid on an overnight flight from SFO-JFK. 

The laptop arrives home dead as dead can be. 

Thus began the tedious undertaking in repair quotes, insurance claim, unsuccessful Time Machine syncs (corrupted files), temporary machines and on and on. 

It's amazing how I am crippled without a working laptop. Do you experience the same? I'm still on a temporary machine but we are near the end of this missing limb saga. 

Since 2016 I feel like I've slowed my travel schedule, spending more time at a single location and being very selective of where I go and purpose of the travel. I would qualify myself to be a great traveler, lover of perpetual motion,  yet the travel in these past couples of months have completely floored me, making this weekly installment nearly impossible. Could I have aged into being a homebody? Yikes! 

Maybe it's because these trips have involved very few down days and each day on the ground are full-on, physically and emotionally demanding. I look to all of my traveling friend, these road warriors, and I wonder how are they all still managing. 

I'm writing to you from a cafe in Istanbul in my old/favorite neighborhood. A cold spell is blowing through the city catching everyone off guard, I included. I packed for Spring in Iraq (where I was) and not for an Arctic chill. 

There is an election in Turkey tomorrow. The political climate is more divisive than ever, perhaps even worst then in the US. The lira is losing value but reinvigorating tourism as a result. I love Istanbul so much that I seriously considered living here long term in 2016 but the way the country is trending post-coupe is just not something I wanted to be a part of. 

How do we draw that line? As expats and as travelers? If we vote with our dollars, then do we not uphold some responsibility to the flourishing of oppression when we choose to be there, for work or pleasure? It's a hard and murky line to draw and I don't have the answers. What are your thoughts on this? 

I'm back and I've missed you! 

Charlie 

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

I'm a member of Acumen Global Leadership and an Edmund Hillary Fellow. Both of them start the community building and getting to know each other as humans before we identify as our profession. It's not uncommon. It can be an uncomfortable process but when it's done right, it is effective in creating deeper bonds that result in greater ROI for both the individual and the network. It's worth considering and adopting. 

WORTH A READ

Amanda Palmer's rambling notes to her Patreon audience are about the only non-work things I've had a chance to read these last few weeks. They are so good. Often ungrammatical, a stream of consciousness style mind dump of anything and everything that is anything but unfocused, extremely intimate and insightful. Unfortunately, these notes are for her Patrons only. However, you can become one for as little as $1 a month. For the writing alone is worth it, not to mention, if you are skilled, you can extract some great marketing insights. 

A POD WORTH LISTENING

Pivot with Kara Swisher and Scott Galloway.

The Venn Diagram of Me and You

Hi Love,

It is necessary for there to be an overlap of some sort, any sort, for two people to become friends. Working at the same place, living in on the same block, having gone to the same school. Forming new friendships was much easier when we were young, at least for me, school and circumstances surrounded me with people all the time. Invariably, I found a nice patch of overlap with them and a friendship grew from there.

It's gotten harder since I've gotten older. The friendship of my thirties was often built on the fertile soil of single women dating. Girlfriends and I would get together and relate tales of the latest guy, share "can you believe he did that," and all the pinning that we allow ourselves to admit to and still proudly claim a feminist.

One girlfriend after another got married, and things started to shift. A few of them severed the friendship outright, a house cleaning that accompanied this brand new chapter of their lives. The wildness of my singleness might stench the blessing of matrimony. Some friends stay in touch but the distance is palpable. There is a new center of gravity, their partners, and that is the way it should be. Partners now do the witnessing and the emotional labors that was once the duty of a good friend. I too am guilty of retracting now that I have found my person.

The one friendship that has remained steady through the years, from our early twenties, stage one of adulthood and into new lives with partners is my friendship with R. We've had our up and downs but we found our way back to each other. I like to believe the weathering deepen the overlap on our Venn diagrams. As I investigate why this relationship with R is so special, I came to see that R and I have found overlaps and overlaps. Some of it by accident, who knew Kundalini yoga is the jam? Some discovered, we share a similar vision for dinner parties and we work remarkably well together in the kitchen. We didn't get here by design; we didn't get here by accident either. We invested time. The magic ingredient that takes us from shared interests (i.e. boys) to experiences, to worldviews and the actions that shape our individual lives.

A community is important. Lots of people talk about the tribe and finding it. I'm all for it. But I've come to believe that passion for the same topic make for weak bonds. Time is the key ingredient. We cannot withhold time if what we seek is a true community.

With love,

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

How do you feel about small talk? A necessary evil of networking event? Family gathering? Would it surprise you to know that small talk can lead to moments of real connection? The beginnings of overlap on the Venn diagram of you and stranger X. Read on here. 

WORTH A READ

The Immortalists by Chloe Benjamin 

I've been on a pretty good roll in terms of fiction. A gypsy arrives in town and four siblings go see her. She tells them the exact date they will die. This knowledge drives each of them towards different decisions and actions for how they live their lives. A very consistent and engaging read throughout. It was a B+ for me until the very end. Chole Benjamin closed really strong, bumping my take on it to a solid A-. 
 

DON'T MISS

All three films in The Worricker Trilogy. So much fun. Bill Nighy is so good. 
 

Time Poverty

Hi Love,

There is no perfect time management system. There is never going to be that just right solution be it analog, digital, app, plug-in, calendar hacks that will get everything organized just so thereby leading to getting everything on the To-Do list DONE. Even if we stopped sleeping, loving, exercising, well, living all together, tie ourselves to the desk and just keep going. At the end of this massive self/life deprivation push, we would still be confronted with a list of what's next. The list self regenerates!

Welcome to time poverty. Time Poverty "exists across all economic strata, and its effects are profound. Research shows that those who feel time-poor experience lower levels of happiness and higher levels of anxiety, depression, and stress. They experience less joy. They laugh less. They exercise less and are less healthy. Their productivity at work is diminished. They are more likely to get divorced." (HBR)

What is more surprising is "the more we get paid for our time, the more we value it, and the more intensely we feel the loss of any moment."

What if we reconsidered time? What if time is elastic and fluid and will expand and contract in relation to us and our mindset? As there is a difference between the experiencing self and the remembering self (Daniel Kahneman) what if we revisited the strictness of 60, 24, 7, 365 and allowed ourselves to be generous with it so it may return to us a different experience?

It's mid-February and I struggle not only with the To-Do but big ideas; maybe time is ever more relevant now that I'm 40.

I want to find a new relationship with Time. One where it is not the ruler over me nor am I the delusional person trying to tame it. A relationship that in mutuality with each other. Something better. Something sweeter.

With Love,

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

Work with your laptop unplugged. Work until the battery is about to die, then take a break. I've been trying it out this week and I'm liking it. It builds in these natural breaks that my eyes need.  

Compounding Knowledge. "A lot of us are on the treadmill of consuming expiring information. Not [Warren] Buffett. He filled his mental filing cabinet with information that had a long half-life." This is a great argument to stop reading a certain kind of daily news, opt for books and long-form essays in addition to taking a long view on all matters including the information and knowledge that we ingest day to day. 
 

WORTH A READ

Time for Happiness. Insightful HBR article that is cited above. 
There are many surprising insights in the article, one of them is "Learn how to say no, but don’t use time as an excuse...People who [use time as an excuse] are seen as less likable and less trustworthy."

I NEED

A media coach. Or someone who can help me translate my theater training into live presentations. 
 

DON'T MISS

Puffs, or: Seven Increasingly Eventful Years at a Certain School of Magic and Magic. 
It's an affectionate spoof on Harry Potter. The seven-year sage told through the house that is least mentioned. It's goofy. It's fun. It's low tech and low production value and it is so well rehearsed that they never miss a beat. It's a pleasure to watch. It reminds me of high school and the kind of play we would stage. 

“The true material of knowledge is meaning. The only way to glean knowledge is contemplation. And the road to that is time. There’s nothing else. It’s just time. There is no shortcut for the conquest of meaning. And ultimately, it is meaning that we seek to give to our lives.” Maria Popova

Are You in the Driver Seat or Hanging on by the Bumper?

Happy New Year!!

Yes, you might say, that was over a month ago. Yes. You are correct. And it is also true that today is day two of Chinese New Year. The best way I've found to keep the binary (potentially toxic) at bay is by reminding myself that many things can be true at the same time. It can get complicated. But it's helpful with empathy, listening, presence and deepening. It allows for another point of view.

I'm sorry this note is late and it is showing up midweek. Re-entry has been a bit of a bitch. It's easy to walk away, to break the habit and let it all go. Getting back into it all has been extremely difficult this time. I feel like the year took off without me and I'm hanging on the bumper like a bad action flick.

Oh boy, did J and I let it all go in those weeks! Down in Patagonia, the troubles of the world seem so far away, just stories you hear. We emptied our minds and filled it with fiction (good and not so good), endless sky, 100km/h wind, ancient granite peaks, delicious crab goodness cooked in butter and more butter, glacier lakes the color of gemstones and new vocabulary for our private language.

Now. Three weeks after our return and well into the calendar year, all the pieces we left behind are shouting for attention with the eager insistence of resolutions and goals chiming in, building towards a loud ruckus.

So Hi! Here I am; here we are. There is nothing to do but do. And into this year we go.

Let's go!

Charlie

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I NEED YOUR VOTE!

HelloFuturehas been named a finalist for AWeber's Small Business Big Impact. Voting closes this Friday. Pleaseclick hereand vote for us. It takes 10 seconds. No registration. No email sign up. Help us win $20K in a grant to continue our work. 

IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

Some obsess over inbox zero. Personally, I'm happy with inbox 100. 
Hack 1:Start a new email account! This comes from Kashmir Hill on her series,"Blocking the Tech Giants." TCutting out Google was week three and she had to start a new email account. So brilliant and simple. Not practical. But can we all just admire the solution for a moment before we dive back in?
Hack 2:Multiply your time by asking 4 questions about the stuff on your to-do list. 
Hack 3:Don't reply to your emails. 

WORTH A READ

Universal Basic Income (UBI) and 70% income tax are ideas that have been around for a long while and newly revived for public debate. Here are two compelling reads on the subject. 

Give People Money: How a Universal Basic Income Would End Poverty, Revolutionize Work, and Remake the World by Annie Lowrey
(I'm in the middle of this book and I'm a fan!) 

Utopia for Realists by Rutger Bregman. This is next on the docket for me. If you don't have time for another 300-page book, he's got a great TED talk. 

I FULLY ENDORSE

Shoshanna Hecht, executive coach. I just had the pleasure of working with Shoshanna and I cannot recommend her more! What is an executive coach and what does she do? In her own words, "I work with successful, high-achieving women to break through the glass ceiling in their own mind." Shoshanna is highly qualified (see her credentials here) first of all, and during our time together, she suggested concrete tactics that I can implement to help me overcome a particular challenge. It is up to me to practice and implement course but unlike psychotherapy, working with Shoshanna is about what's next. 

DON'T MISS

The Jungle. I've seen my fair share of plays (I studied theater in undergrad) and this is by far one of the best plays I have ever seen. It's run in NYC has closed but it is coming to San Francisco The Curran. SEE IT. 

What the Constitution Means to Me returns to NYC March 14th. It's a fantastic one act and an Obie Award winner. 

I'll leave you with Speaker Nancy Pelosi's sarcasm-laden clap for Trump's State of the Union speech....it so good!

The Purpose of Loneliness

Hi Love,

these last days of the year seem to trigger all sorts of feelings. More than one major media outlet has done a story on loneliness. It is the season. It also should come as no surprise to anyone that technology and excessive work are major contributors to the spread of social isolation. What is interesting is that we might use these feelings as a signal flare for our own state of being as well as a collective response to society at large. A check engine light of sort. “Amidst the glossiness of late capitalism, we are fed the notion that all difficult feeling—depression, anxiety, loneliness, rage—are simply a consequence of unsettled chemistry, a problem to be fixed, rather than a response to structural injustice.” (Olivia Laing, Lonely City)

Unlike other social ills, our small individual actions can have a measurable impact. Call a friend you haven't talked to in a while. No, do not send a tweet or draft an email but pick up the phone and call. It needs to be low on tech and high on the personal touch. And for those of you who are overachievers, organize a dinner. By reinforcing our own social network IRL and encouraging others in our network to do the same we start to create more resiliency and add sparkles of light in what could be a deep dark night. Pay it forward and let it ripple onward. Society is a collective construct. We are continuously making and breaking and remaking it. It's time to see the mechanic!

If you are in the Pittsburg area, check out Hello Neighbor, they pair hosts with newly settled refugee families to show them around and essentially be a good neighbor to those who are far away from their homeland. The Difference provides on-demand access to therapy as an Alexa Skill, which means you can simply shout at your Alexa enabled device and get added to a queue to speak with a train professional in as quick as 30 minutes. Since we are deep in helpful resources, remember there is always the National Suicide Prevention Hotline and The Trevor Project which is created for LGBTQ youth.  

Sending you much light and love --- You are not alone! 

Charlie 

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

Continuing with the theme this week, check out: 

How to connect with depressed friends. 

WORTH A READ

Olivia Laing, The Lonely City: Adventures in the Art of Being Alone. This brilliant book as a finalist for the National Book Critics Circle Award in Criticism and named best book of the year (2016) by NPR, Newsweek, Slate, Pop Sugar, Marie Claire, Elle, Publishers Weekly, and Lit Hub

It is a biography/memoir/cultural criticism on the subject of loneliness, told through the lives of iconic artists. It is a meander and you have to clear some time to go with Ms Laing on this journey, oh it is so worth it. It's a gorgeous insightful read irrespective to your current state of being. 

WANDERLUST

For weekly readers, you already know Cairo is up next followed by Patagonia. For those of you who pop in every here and there, I will be speaking at NEXUS Cairo on informal education for refugees in the MENA region followed by El Chalten for my 40th birthday. There is a corner in our house that is slowly gathering a collection of outdoor gears in anticipation for Patagonia. I'm looking forward to both very much. If you've been to Cairo since Arab Spring or Patagonia, let me know. Love to hear your thoughts on either or both. 

DON'T MISS

A chance to be a family's personal paparazzi, earn $100K and travel the world all expense paid. A friend sent it along and I thought I would share it with you. I would have been all over it in 2013-14 but less so now. 
At Home. An exquisite photo essay by California Sunday Magazine with an accompanying exhibit at Aperture gallery in NYC. 
2018 Fruitcake Redemption Contest hosted by Kitchen Arts and Letters. I'm so curious I'm about to play hookey and go check this out. 

Is it Time to Hibernate?

HI Love,

It's been bear of a week here. HOLY HECK! (Yes, I'm trying to watch my language and correct the potty mouth that has gone unchecked for 25 years. Too little too late? Time will tell). Other people's misery never brings me joy but there is something comforting about knowing I'm not the only one who experienced the week as such. How was your week? 

"Bear of a week..." what a phrase. And it got me wondering, what other animals make a cameo in the day to day colloquial? A quick Google search returned the following: 

1 – the elephant in the room.
2 – one-trick pony.
3 – the lion's share.
4 – Hold your horses!
6 – pig-headed.
7 – weasel out of ...
8 – the cat's meow.
9 – let the cat out of the bag.
10 - let the sleeping dog lie

We need to use "bear of a week" a lot more before it will rank in any list but I'm confident we can get there. 

I could riff on this for a while but better we get to the useful part of this little love note. 

Love, 

Charlie 

PS. I owe some of you a reply. You will hear from me in the next couple of days. Just let me get caught up here. 

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

Here it is, the last month of 2018. Do you have an end of the year ritual? Will you share? I've essentially worked for myself in these last twenty years and December is always quiet. In the early years, I used to freak out, until I learned to use December to plan for what's ahead and be deliberate about the steps ahead. Let's plan for 2019 in December than January. Take your time, mull it over, debate it amongst friends, ask a mentor, check out online tutorials for a new skill, read a book for a new perspective. 

Bobbi Lane and I taught a class this week at B&H Photo for emerging photographers. My portion of the lecture involved an overview of marketing for freelancers. For more in-depth training on all things social and inbound marketing, check out: HubSpot Academy. 

If you had a chance to read my mid-week special announcement, and the ask (the fundraiser continues), and share my discomfort in asking, Amanda Palmer's "The Art of Asking" is fabulous. I recommend it for all artists and freelancers. I usually prefer to read the book but I listened to it on audiobook. Narrated by Amanda,  it's an added bonus. 

If you are not sure what is next and could use a little clarity before mapping out a game plan, Danielle LaPorte's Fire Starters Session and White Hot Truth are awesome. A mixture of light memoir + personal development + business acumen. I believe it's available on multiple formats including a Udemy Online Course. Google around and see what works best for you. [FULL DISCLOSURE - women will find deeper resonance with LaPorte's teaching and methods. Gentleman, step to your edge and give her a try. You do want women as clients don't you?]

WORTH A READ

RICE NOODLE FISH: Deep Travels Through Japan's Food Culture by Matt Goulding. This is the first in a series for Matt and in my opinion the best one. The second in the series is on Spain followed by Italy. 

This first book by him is the kind of book I wish I had time to write. His writing, his love for Japan and the food bumped Japan up on my list of countries to revisit and see it differently, to see it as he had.

WANDERLUST

Cairo is up next. I'm speaking at NEXUS on informal education and how it can help bridge the education gap for hundreds and thousands of refugees who don't have access to good formal education. I was last in Cairo in 2010, before the Arab Spring. Have you been since? Let me know your impressions if you've been there recently. 

DON'T MISS

In keeping with the animal theme this week...
Tiny Hamsters Eats A Tiny Burrito. 
I won't say anymore and let you check it out for yourself. 

Grumpy? 7 tips on what to do.

Hi Love,

Do you ever get annoyed for no reason? Or annoyed because of a nearly nothing reason? These four days of Thanksgiving weekends are full of opportunities for these nearly nothing bits of annoyance to pop up and ruin your day. 

I got annoyed on Friday. I suspect I woke up that way and with the annoyance lens on, it was an uphill battle to shift into something neutral, god forbid something sweeter. Here are some of my go-to tricks when the day is such: 

1. Eat. Maybe I'm hungry. 

2. Nap. Tried and true with a 90% success rate. And fewer calories too. 

3/4. A brisk walk with headphone in/Yoga. Great options and it will burn off some of the calories from option one but it just is not something I choose with frequency. I should. But I don't. 

5. Lay down on the grass. I meant to take a walk around Central Park but the first nice patch of grass is so inviting...a little from option two and a little from three. It grounds me, the body, the earth, and letting go. 

6. Shower. Maybe I literally need to wash the ick off. 

7. Distraction. A good plot to lose myself in to stop thinking about how annoyed I am. 

This is the fourth installment of these weekly love notes. How are you liking it? Useful? Amusing? Inspiring? Let me know how you are finding it and what you would like more of. 

I am so grateful that you are here with me. 

Love,

Charlie  

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

I've got a few interesting things for you this week. 

1. Polarity Management.

I'm going through Acumen's Leadership Training Program and how to manage opposing view was the topic this week. It's based on Barry Johnson's book and the core idea is "polarity is not a problem to be solved but a system of energy to be managed." 

It's pretty dense and we were only got through the top line idea in a two-hour session. This work holds strong resonance in this political climate. It's heated. It's divisive. Each side edges towards a zero-sum game. Under Johnson's premise, instead of one side eviscerating the other and we keep taking turns doing that, we manage the polarity with early warning signs and corresponding corrective measures. If we catch it early then the correction doesn't need to be huge. More importantly, the polarity quadrant Johnson lays out reminds us that we have a shared goal in this tug-a-war, that greater good --- whatever it may be, and everything we do should be in service of the big picture.  

2. How to Turn Around a Sinking Ship? 

Victoria Secret has come under a lot of criticisms of late, leading to a CEO resignation. I got off the train at Herald Square, a station that covered in Victoria Secret advertisement and I wondered what I would do to save the brand (if it was up to me). It felt daunting, suddenly I had it. An idea for an ad campaign that would be the first step in rehabilitating a brand that has failed to generate excitement for the past decade. 

The ads would feature the top tier models as it has done except you would only see their head, shoulder, and legs. Their midsection, where the product lives, is covered up in the ad, the copy would say, "Curious to see what I have on? Not without my consent." 

It would create a splash and get them a lot of free media. It addresses where we are culturally in this moment and stops pretending like it doesn't have a role to play. It takes a stand, which some business fear and see as risky, but let's be real. It's not a political position such as TOMS and Gun Safety. It's a relative mild position that says consent is important and rape is bad. I think we can all get on board with that. 

This is the easy part. To come up with fun, splashy campaigns, you need a good pulse on what is going on culturally, understand the critique of the brand, then start at the complete opposite end of the spectrum of the status quo and start brainstorming. This method is effective for idea generating in all areas, not just for ad campaigns for major brands. 

The hard part is what comes after. An ad is a new dress. It doesn't make you skinnier or kinder or smarter or wealthier. You can build towards it from the outside in, a la Method Acting, or you can do it from the inside out, a la Stanislovsky. Both works.  

WORTH A READ

Love and Ruin: Tales of Obsession, Danger, and Heartbreak from The Atavist Magazine. An incredible collection of long-form essays. Impeccable writers; brilliant stories.  I've been slowly making my way through the collection, savoring one story at a time, between books, slightly dreading the day when I flip to the last page of the last story. One of my favorite essays is "52 Blue." It is about a whale that sings at a frequency that few whales sing at, he's lonely and can't attract a mate at this frequency. The whale becomes an embodiment of loneliness and attracts fandom worldwide. Long-form essays are time-consuming to read and it's a lovely way to slow down in a fast-paced endless news cycle world. 

WANDERLUST

Thank you for your four-season tent suggestions. I've landed on Sierra Design Convert 2. J and I will be gearing up over the next few weeks and get ready to celebrate my 40th trip around the sun at the edge of the world! 

DON'T MISS

I actually missed it. Keep an eye out for a play,  "What the Constitution Means to Me."  It got rave reviews here in NYC and had an extended run. I would be surprised if it doesn't show up in LA, Chicago or London next. 

Amazon Eats the World

Hi Love,

How was your week? Thanksgiving, are you for real? How did you get here so fast! J and I don't have much in the way of family commitments. We get to just be us, maybe have some friends over for dinner one night, but otherwise, we get to write and be with each other. A tiny and complete universe. 

A friend shared this with me after last week's note: 

"When the water in Flint, Michigan was orange from lead contamination the kids from our afterschool program were asked to donate a case of bottled water for the people suffering in Flint. Two kids blurted out 'why should we, they wouldn't do it for us.' That seemed to be the consensus of the class. These were public school kids in another economically impoverished district. The boss told the students he had never heard of anything like their reaction before. " 

Such stark contrast with the reaction of the wealthy kids from the private school where I gave a presentation. HOLY SHIT!

It's too easy to say that this is an economic issue, especially when middle and lower income families donate a larger percentage of their income to charity than the wealthiest Americans.*

What drives giving, compassion and the desire to help? I'd love to know your take on this. 

Wishing you a wonderful Thanksgiving, with or without family, 

Charlie 

PS. I am so grateful for you, your friendship and you being here with me every week. 

*The Chronicles of Philanthropy

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

How about an edible idea this week instead? 

KALE AND ROASTED SQUASH/SWEET POTATO SALAD WITH HAZELNUT, SAGE AND BROWN BUTTER VINAIGRETTE. 

Roast the squash or sweet potato, both work equally well. 

A giant bunch of your favorite kale, de-stem, massage and get them ready to be part of a salad. 

Fresh sage leaves, 8-10. Gently fry them in a little olive oil, once they are cool enough to handle, crumble them into the salad.

Hazelnut. Chop them a little and add to the mix. 

Now for the best part of this salad, brown butter vinaigrette! Brown the butter in a small saucepan, then add either balsamic vinegar or a combo of balsamic and apple cider vinegar to the fat. Whisk and salt to taste. If you use 4tbs of butter, then you will add 2 tbs of vinegar and etc. 

This is so yummy, brown butter makes everything more delicious, so easy, your guest will swoon! 

I borrowed this from Salt, Fat, Acid and Heat. A pretty awesome cookbook for cooks of all levels. 

WORTH A READ

Amazon is coming to town...NY and DC that is. Like many, I fear this will not end well for average New Yorkers and DC-ians (what is the collective noun for those who live in DC?). We already have a weak infrastructure system, our housing is laughably unaffordable, failing public schools, a Grand Canyon size income divide, and a tough dating scene. None of this will be improved by the arrival of Amazon and more computer engineers. 

What makes NYC so appealing to all who live here and those who dream of being here is the character, energy, diversity, and permissiveness. Except the forces of gentrification have been flattening out our lady's character bit by bit since 1980s. "Gentrification is about class—and the places where class intersects with race and other factors, like education and sexual orientation—but it is always about an imbalance of power. And in every scenario, the gentrifiers have more power.” Amazon is raw power with their $1T market cap. 

Jeremiah Moss's “Vanishing New York" is a love letter to the city, this city, a city that is so potent, we will give up job and love to be here. Matthew Desmond, "Evicted" is one of the best books I read last year (!). He masterfully gives you a look at the housing crisis in the US. "The Life and Death of Great American Cities" by Jane Jacob will make you think deeply about how to build community and what makes for a great neighborhood (hint: it's not Starbucks or cafes with Edison bulbs). 

WANDERLUST

Patagonia is happening! I am so excited. 
Need advice on 4 season tents, please. 

DON'T MISS

Bryan Cranston on Broadway in Network. It's....amazing. 
Ever wonder if we can replenish the wild with pandas raised in captivity? The Chinese are trying and it's tough. To start, it involves humans in panda suits that are sprayed with panda urine and feces. 
All the tiny things we overlook is listed beautifully in Carrie Newcomer's Three Gratitudes. 

How do we change the world?

Hi Love,

Are you tired? I am. I'm exhausted by the speed we are moving at. We won the House but not the Senate. We flipped many districts and retook the Governor's mansion in  7 previously Republican-held states, fingers crossed for two more with GA and FL. Our victory only puts Trump in a rage and the fight continues. I keep on reminding myself that incremental progress will lead to an avalanche and remake the world. While we keep at it with small changes the drip drip at times can feel like Chinese water torture. 

I did a presentation on Hello Future to a class full of 10-year-olds at Trinity, a super-elite private school in NYC. Five minutes into the presentation, a girl raised her hand and asked how they could help. I turned the question back to them and asked them why they care? Why do they want to help refugee kids that are half-a-world away? 

They instinctively knew. One girl said, "We are privileged to go to this school and we should use our privilege to help others." Another girl said that it is part of our Dharma, our social responsibility. Each and every one of them understood that we live in a world that is deeply connected

I was speechless. There might be hope for us all yet.

How do we make sure we keep these kids fire going and continue to foster their innate sense of social justice?! Do you guys think about this with your kids? What is your approach? Let me know. I'd love to get inside of your head. 

Keep on keeping on, 

Charlie 

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

As part of any business strategy, target audience identification is a must. How do you know what to say to them if you don't know what they are interested in? However, we frequently assume the audience; a lot of guesswork goes into who we believe would care about what we do, what we sell, what we have to say. Rather than assume the target audience for Hello Future (liberal white women), we are testing our way into clarity. You can do this too. Our approach is a modest budget, lots of research and well calibrated Google Display Ads. 

If you are interested in doing this for your business, and I can help, raise a flag and let me know. 

WORTH A READ

How do we change the world is a question I've been asking myself for the last twenty years. This issue of Columbia's Journalism Review has some deep reflections on how the under-representation of people of color in newsrooms across the country hinders our progress, much like the under-representation in various branches of government. I'm convinced that Obama's Netflix deal is about less about the gobs of money they threw at him and more about culture change. Nothing moves the needle quite like pop-culture and we don't have to talk about politics to change perception, advocacy and voter turn out. Grant McCracken's book, Culturematic is a great read on this topic as well as Rebecca Solnit's Hope in the Dark. 

WANDERLUST

Raise your hand if you've been to Patagonia. It's late in the season but we would love to head down to El Chalten and do a long distance trek. Love to know if you've been and your experience. 

#HUMBLEBRAG

Side Hustle. Yeah that's a thing. I've never only had just one job. Forbes ran a story on side hustle this week and I was featured. What's your side hustle? Do you guard it like it's a deep dark secret? Or do you proudly share it with your network? 

DON'T MISS

Bohemian Rhapsody. Go see it. Bryan Singer was a little light on the story but Rami Malek's performance is top notch. This is the closest you will get to a Queen's concert. And what a joy it is. Freddy Mercury changed the world. NO DOUBT. Can you think of another song that rallies and unit the way "We are the Champion" or "We will Rock You?" NOPE. I present you, Freddy Mercury, exhibit A of social change.  

GOOD IDEA OR NOT SO MUCH? 

WeCroak is an app that will randomly text you 5 times a day and remind you that you will die. It is inspired by a Bhutanese folk saying that to be a happy person one must contemplate death 5 times a day. Anyone wants to try it with me? 

THE DR. IS IN

Week one of THE DR IS IN has been interesting. More ponderings than questions but that's alright. Tell me what you've been thinking, should I/shouldn't I, be it in business, art, the art business, travel, communications or even love, and I will do my best. 

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There will always be a first time

“Hi Love,” is my favorite greeting. Vu was the first person to greet me with "Hi Love!" It took me by surprise when I first heard it. Vu and I are friends and colleagues. Without a whiff of romance and being addressed as "love" seemed...unexpected. And incredibly flattering. Through those two little words, I was transformed into a personification of love, platonic love, romantic love, or simply, LOVE. 

These two words establish an immediate sense of intimacy, I feel seen, safe and cared for. A little dose of optimism through a simple greeting. 

I'm sorry I've been absent. I'm ready to return, in this form, a weekly note every Sunday, Hi Love, and I hope to fill it with useful, humorous, and informative tidbits for you. 

Will you give Hi Love, a few weeks and see how you like it? 

With love, 

Charlie

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IDEAS YOU CAN STEAL

This should be a softball, but I'm constantly surprised by how frequently our consulting clients are unable to answer this fundamental question, "What is your objective?" 

A client engaged us to help them come up with punty funny names for new programs they are about to announce. They wanted puns that both explains the program and echoes the name of the organization. For the sake of clarity, I asked, "what is your objective? Is this for the sake of your grantees, your donors or are you trying to leverage the humor to gain traction with a greater audience?" The silence on the other end of the call was deafening. 

Branding/Messaging/Strategic Planning 101: be clear about what you are trying to achieve before all else. 

WORTH A READ

Scott Galloway's No Malice/No Mercy weekly note has become one of my favorite. His market analysis is spot on. For a Capitalist with a moral compass, he is walking that fine line mighty fine. And he can write. Read "Brands and Bone Saw" here and judge for yourself. 

WANDERLUST

Faroe Island. Have you been? Tell me about it...

#HumbleBrag

New York Business Journal and Career Contessa both featured me and the unconventional career path from advertising photographer to refugee education at Hello Future. I know I am not the only one here with a nonlinear career trajectory, what is yours? 

IRL

Opening November 8 at Gallery Henoch, Parallel Transformations, an exhibition by Kim Cogan. Much of his riveting work is about New York, or more precisely, the story of light in New York. 

Joan Bankemper at Rachel Uffner Gallery in LES, NYC, in Pageant of Inconceivable, a group exhibition of fourteen artists producing ceramic works that reflect on the human condition in a variety of approaches and scale.

THE DR. IS IN

When R and I lived together, we talked about setting up a table at Union Square and field questions and quandaries as Lucy from Peanuts did. Here is a virtual version of that. Tell me what you've been pondering, be it in business, art, the art business, travel, communications or even love, and I will do my best. 

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